This should be good for a laugh - oil change virgin

**Hutch** · 09-19-2006, 06:36 AM

Just wanted to say hello and thanks to all for the good advice on this board. I just went to change the oil on our 2001 XC70 for the first time and was at a bit of a loss. After getting the skid plate off, getting the proper oil filter cap off Ebay (strap wrenches and oil filter wrenches wouldn’t work), the crush washer for the plug, and going out to buy the 24mm socket to get the oil drain plug off, I finally got the job done. Only to then try to run the car and see that the transmission isn’t working. What the…? I didn’t touch the transmission, I just changed the oil! Oh cr@p!

Yes, I said 24mm drain plug – i.e. the tranny drain plug. Seems that I drained the uber expensive transmission fluid, then added another 5 quarts of oil to the engine before I checked it and saw that it was overfilled. I’ve been changing oil in too many cars to count since I was 12 in my Dad’s repair shop, and this is the first time I’ve ever done anything like this (admittedly most were simple domestic cars – this canister filter was new to me, and there is no way I’m going to pay the $17 that our auto parts store charged me for the Fram replacement again). With some more help from searching this forum, I found the transmission dipstick (why the %*&%# did they make that so tough to get to!!!) and topped off. Not easy to check, but I kept adding just a bit at a time to try to get to the right level. Drained and changed the oil properly, and everything is back to normal.

Thanks again for all the help – this is a great site that I intend to come back often – next time BEFORE I start a job!!!

**Pennhaven** · 09-19-2006, 08:55 AM

Tsk. Tsk. Tsk. Good thing you seem to have a sense of humor. Don't feel bad. Every do-it-yourselfer has their own embarassing story. And there are plenty of so called "pros" out there who mess things up just as badly every day.

**1Lieutenant** · 09-19-2006, 09:08 AM

Thanks for the laugh!! (We are only laughing WITH you....not at you)

Steve

**gibbons** · 09-19-2006, 09:42 AM

Hey Hutch, let me displace your deed from the bottom of the knucklehead acts list and make you feel a little better.

Ok, I admit it, I let the dealer change my oil a couple of times on their free maintenance program for 04's. I would take a 5 quart jug + a 1 quart bottle of Mobile 1 for them to install instead of their conventional oil. The last time I did, the technician called me and asked if I had put an additive in the 5 quart jug before I brought it in. "Noooooo....." I said. He then asked why the oil was so dark and had grass and stuff in it. Yikes, I had taken him the jug I use to take used yucky oil to the recycling station, and he had poured it in!!!! I am none too careful with my drain pans, so the oil in the jug had all kinds of dirt and crap in it.

I was sick, but he said he noticed the stuff as the jug was dripping dry, and didn't start the engine. So he dumped the crap oil, put in a fresh fill of conventional oil, started it, dumped it, and refilled it. When I got home, I dumped it, changed the filter, and put in new Mobile 1 with some engine cleaning stuff. I ran it for the cleaner's recommended 5 minute idle, dumped that, and put in anther new filter and fresh Mobile 1 again. I drove that for a few hundred miles, and changed the oil/filter again.

I don't think any damage was done, such as cylinder wall scuffing or anything. I am at about 5K miles the most recent change, and the oil is only down about 1/10 of the scale on the dipstick, as it always did. Extrapolating that, it looks like I get rediculously low oil consumption, like in the 50K miles per quart range! That's an amazingly well built engine.

There, I have confessed.

**BillAileo** · 09-19-2006, 10:44 AM

I'll add to the knucklehead reports: I really like doing my own maintenance work and have done it for many years. My wife is not into such things and I have tended not to pay enough attention to her observations. One day several years ago when we had a pair of 240 series Volvos, she informed me that the gearshift in her's was no longer in the same position it had been in for the first 150,000 miles. I laughed and ignored her. About a month later I crawled under the car to change the oil and found that the engine mounts had failed and the oil filter was serving as the right side engine mount. And yes, indeed, the gearshift was displaced.....

**Jake529** · 09-19-2006, 11:48 AM

I have a 87 BMW 325 190k on the ticker... Brake pad warning light comes on... I hear the noise from the front pads... I go down to the parts store buy the chepo pads. Jack up the car, take of the old pads put on the new ones. Takes me about 10 minutes... Get in the car and drive off for the test drive...... Everything is fine... Car sits for a couple of days, I go to the beach with the two dogs. I am half way there and I hear a horrible sound from the front end... Can't be the brakes!!!!!!!!! HORRIBLE>>>>> I drive to the beach, head for home brakes are working but very loud.. Damn those cheap pads...

I get home jack up the car and spin the left side, fine no problem, spin the right side and there is the noise........

Take off the wheel and caliper... I put the inside pad inside out........... Killed the pad on the mounting side, Turned it around, put the caliper back on along with the wheel... Sound gone....

How dumb can I be???? Oh yea stupid is as stupid gets...

Joliet Jake

**JsR** · 09-19-2006, 03:08 PM

I don't think I can top the previous stories (yikes, potentially VERY expensive) but can I add one? Well I'm going to anyway.

Arrived back home after a trip out and the passenger door window wouldn't wind up, on my old Toyota. Bad weather was forecast so I set to and tried to fix it. Stripped the door panels, traced and tested all the electric circuits I could, tore my hands up inside the door cavity etc. I don't remember what I did about testing the motor but I know I ruled it out as the fault of the problem. I stripped out the dash where necessary to get at the wiring (fuses were under the dash). By this time it was getting dark so I stuck plastic all over the open window so I could leave it for the night and try again the next day. Sunday dawned - clear weather thank goodness so I set to again. I'd worked on it for about three hours on the Saturday then for another couple on the Sunday. My neighbour came over to try to lend me a hand and as I was explaining the problem, describing where the cables ran etc. I saw that I'd pushed down the button on the DRIVERS door panel to activate the 'faulty' PASSENGER window child safety lock..... I put the button in the correct position and MY FACE WAS RED

, but I was at least relieved.

Moral of the story - I'll always look for the simple solution first.

John R

**Pennhaven** · 09-20-2006, 08:22 AM

Originally Posted by JsR

Moral of the story - I'll always look for the simple solution first.

About 17 years ago we lived in a house on a large hilly lot so we bought a John Deere lawn tractor to do the mowing (Still using that Deere 17 years later!). My wife enjoys mowing the lawn (Lucky me!), so she usually mowed while I was off at work. It wasn't long though till she began complaining that the tractor engine was stumbling and stalling while she mowed.

Funny, it always ran fine for me, but being "Mr. Fixit" I went into rapid trouble shooting mode. Intermittent ignition connection? Dirt in the fuel system? So I spent a lot of time cleaning the plug, checking all the connections, flushing the fuel lines and carb, replacing fuel filter, etc. and of course it continued to run great for me. But every time my wife used it she complained that it still stalled.

So I finally wise up and ask her to show me exactly what she was doing when it stalled. Then this "mechanic" realizes that as she is going around turns at the tops and bottoms of the hill she is lifting her petite 110 lbs. off the seat just enough to cause the underseat safety switch to open stalling the engine exactly as it is supposed to! DUH.

**archerm3** · 09-21-2006, 01:46 PM

Ten years ago, changing oil in my collector 85 Elcamino SS, simple chevy V8 I had done tens of times before, I finished filling oil and started it up. I was at my storage area, where the owner had just installed a new blacktop driveway, on top of which I was changing my oil. Seconds after starting it up, I noticed a pool of clean oil flowing from around the front tire. At that very moment the owner came up to complain about oil changing on the lot with the metal ramps digging in and the oil debonding the asphalt. Shut her down while I still had a quart or two left in the engine. Looked underneath to find oil around the filter. Looked at the filter and it was not the normal PH30 I was used to. ???
When I went to autozone, I selected the row of PH30s, but like a good consumer selecting milk or eggs, I picked the second filter back from front, without a second glance. That turned out to not be a PH30...